Things You’ll Never Hear From – Or About – Liberals And Their Policies



As regular readers of Rat’s Right! know, one of Rat’s favorite sayings is: “The hypocrisy of liberals knows no bounds.” Combine that truism with the reality of the political lie, which Rat defines as “liberals saying things they know aren’t true for the sole purpose of exploiting the ‘less than informed’ for political gain,” and you know everything you need to know about our friends on the left.

With that thought in mind, here are a few comments and observations I’d love to hear from – or about – liberals and their policies. I will not, however, hold my breath. (Neither should you.)

O, in a late-night phone call to Joe Biden: “Joe – it just dawned on me – Ronald Reagan was right: government is the problem!”

Harry Reid, in a phone call to Nancy Pelosi: “Hey Nancy, this is probably going to shock you, but I just did the math myself, and guess what? The top 5% of wage earners do pay more federal tax than the bottom 95% combined! All this talk about “fair share” is a load of crap!”

Said no one ever: “Wow, that socialist country sure has a bitchin’ economy and a strong middle class!”

Al Sharpton, in a phone call to Jesse Jackson: “I’ve been thinking about Dr. Ben Carson, and you know what, Jesse? This guy is dope. I mean, he’s a great role-model for our people! We really need to embrace Dr. Ben – and all the other black conservatives. It’s time that we get their message out; hold them up as examples of what we can be if we stop blaming conservative white people for keeping us down – and start talking about initiative and hard work.”

Planned Parenthood chief, Cecile Richards, appearing on Piers Morgan Tonight: “Piers, I am here tonight to announce that, after doing a tremendous amount of soul searching, we now believe that fetuses are, in fact, unborn babies. Furthermore, we also believe that purposely ending their lives is murder. As a result, Planned Parenthood will no longer perform abortions.”

Nancy Pelosi, in a phone call to Harry Reid: “You know, Harry, it’s time we as a party stop exploiting blacks. I mean, think about it: we have patronized the crap out of them for more than 50 years, and what has it accomplished – other than to perpetuate unfair resentment against the Republicans and allow us to carry the black vote? We need to think more about them from now on than we do about hanging on to power, Harry.”

From an announcement posted on the homepage of the Freedom from Religion Foundation: “After careful consideration, we are announcing today that we will no longer focus on Christianity in our fight against religion. The fact is, Christians neither offend us nor pose a threat to our existence. Moving forward, we will focus our entire efforts and resources on attacking Islam, the so-called “peaceful religion.” We look forward to this new direction with courage and determination.”

Bibi Netanyahu, speaking before the Knesset: “This afternoon, I received a phone call from President Obama – during which, he apologized profusely for throwing Israel under the bus for the last five years. The president not only committed to change his behavior immediately, but also promised to inform Mahmoud Abbas, Hamas and Hezbollah that from now on, he will hold them accountable, and them accountable alone – both publicly and privately – for their unprovoked attacks against our nation.”

A tweet from Sean Penn to Tim Robbins: “TR, Ronald Reagan was right when he said: ‘It’s not that liberals are ignorant; it’s just that they know so much that isn’t so.’ Timmy, let’s face it – we don’t know our asses from a hole in the ground!”

Union thug Richard Trumka, president of the AFL-CIO, speaking before a national conference: “I’ve come to the realization that Barack Obama has been playing us like a fiddle – just like he does the minorities. This son-of-a-bitch couldn’t care less about America’s laborers; he just panders the shit out us for money and votes! Screw him! I’m not only going to give hundreds of millions of dollars of your union dues to the Republican Party from now on; I’ll be voting Republican for the rest of life as well!”

O to Mooch: “Mishy, I’ve been thinking about something. We need to take a lesson from Pope Francis, and back off all the luxurious vacations. Besides, in light of all the drummed up fear I’ve tried to create over the sequester, my golf weekend with Tiger and sending the girls to the Bahamas for spring break really made me look like an incredibly hypocritical jackass!”

Tingles, at the end of a Hardball with Chris Matthews broadcast: “Before we go, I just gotta say that looking back over the last four years, I now realize that I’ve made a pathetic buffoon out of myself, night in and night out, as I’ve fawned – uncontrollably at times – over President Obama and his family. In fact, it’s reached a point where there isn’t anything in life that I don’t view as ‘racist’ anymore. As a result, I will be taking a short leave from Hardball to seek the professional help that I so desperately need. It’s my hope to return to the air – next time, as a real journalist – soon. God bless America.”

A cold day in hell, huh?

O’s America.

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